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Blog! Seize the day, then let it go 

BLOG INDEX

How To Do A Daily Check-In And Intention Setting

27/7/2023

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To help see the value of this let's look at the story of Jo and Jae, two friends who lead similar lives.  It's a cold, icy and wet Tuesday morning...

Jo is woken up by the alarm at 6:50am and looks at the weather, through the window, hits the snooze and goes back to sleep. Jo does this reputedly until 7:30am when it's time to get breakfast. In a hurry Jo spills the tea and in a rush to get in the car accidently drops the keys under the car, in the icy rain! Jo is annoyed with the cold weather and worried about an important meeting at work. On the drive Jo is going too fast, the radio is too loud and Jo nearly hits an elderly person crossing the street. Instead Jo swerves and hit's a bollard. Jo winds down the window to shout at them, unaware of a police officer approaching to give Jo a ticket for dangerous driving! 

Jae is woken up by the alarm at 6:50am and remembers an intention to meditate. Despite the cold outside Jae sits up straight on the floor, under a blanket, tea steaming in front for 10 minutes, focusing on the sensations of the body and observing the thoughts passing across the mind. Jae feels more centred after this and checks-in by talking out loud and then setting an intention for the day. Today Jae remembers an important meeting and Jae decides to practice calmness in preparation and during the meeting. During breakfast Jae listens to calming music and in the car Jae drives carefully, enjoying the frosty trees and children throwing snowballs. An elderly person is crossing and Jae stops, winds down the window to say hello before driving off and smiling at the nice response.

The difference in these two days is clear and it can be attributed to setting an intention the night before to wake up and create space to meditate and check in.

This is something I try to do every weekday and I'm starting to open this up to others to join me. If you're interested check here to see if they are ongoing now.

The structure I often use is the folliwng:
  • Meditation: This is the practice of being with myself. I sit on the floor, in a comfortable way, back stright. I set a 10 or 15 minute timer. I close my eyes and breath long, slow and deep. I settle into natural breathing and bring my attention inside to be curious and Notice, Observe and Wonder about how amazing my mind-body is. 
  • ​Check-In: I talk to a friend or myself, or sometimes I write in a diary. I use the tool PIES & Gravy:
    • P: Physical: What am I noticing in my body? 
    • I: Intellectual: What is my mind thinking about?
    • E: Emotional: What emotions are present?
    • S: Seeking: What are you longing for more of or what do you want?
    • Gravy: What am I grateful for? (I try and find 3 minimum)
  • Intention Setting: With all that information I simply pause and consider what might help me make today more wonderful? I state it as a positive - what I want (not a negative - what I don't want) declaration. Eg. I intend to practice being calm today 
    (A negative one would say I don't want to get stressed and uptight today)

Finally it's important to get up and move. In the past I have allowed the time boundary to lapse and I can spend an hour reflecting and getting caught up in thinking. Instead make it a practice to stand up and DO SOMETHING. I often do a short stretch and then go get breakfast. 

I hope this helps you have a more wonderful day. 

Come join me on my daily Morning Meditation and Check In . 


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Fuel inspiration by pondering the beginning of all life

22/7/2023

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Mindfulness is all about being in the NOW. I have created an acronym to help us remember to cultivate our curious and creative state. This is the thing that will turn suffering into life. Pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice. You can be lost in the suffering of your mental anguish - FOMO, guilt, worry, resentment - or you can choose to process these things:

  1. Notice them - stop what you’re doing and tune in, recognise them, express them out loud or on paper.
  2. Observe them - allow yourself to see them, step back and communicate with them, and stay connected as they shift and morph. Track them in the body.
  3. Wonder - stay curious, and open minded. Where will they go and why? What’s this all about? 

Positively-Mindful is the name of my work because I want us to stay positive with our minds. One of the underlying thoughts here is the question ‘is the root of life, or your self or the creative force or ‘god’ or whatever you want to call it is either…
  1. Benevolent and loving 
  2. Neutral - not really interested or caring how it goes
  3. Capricious and wicked, sometimes

The old religions of Ancient Greece may have said number 3. The modern scientific take is often B, because the idea of a creator or creative force has been replaced by the idea of a random coincidence of events creating life in the primordial soup on planet earth. I argue the answer is A, because I can sense the love within myself, underneath all the conditioning of mind-made ideas and the ‘survival self’ my human organism has been forced to create in order to survive my teens. Let’s examine a little deeper why it is not B, for me, by looking at the main scientific theory of evolution. 

Evolution argues all life is connected and emerged from a primordial soup of dead molecules that somehow formed early strands of amino acids that eventually became DNA (Deoxyribonucleic acid) - the building blocks of all life on Earth. DNA is more complex than a modern smartphone, partly because it is able to replicate itself. Can a smartphone do that?

There is code within DNA,  which is as impossible to occur naturally or randomly as it would be for the components of a smartphone to occur naturally. It would be like just the right amount of heat and elements coming together to form a plastic rectangular filled with microcircuitry and a screen. Nope - impossible, even with an infinite timeline. Like proteins, the formation of RNA (polymers of nucleotides) requires complex cellular machinery. It simply can’t occur spontaneously.


Even with the watchmaker idea evolution doesn’t explain how life emerged and the most plausible definition is actually that a creator is responsible, or that this is all a dream of that creator. It is a fascinating idea and to be honest we don’t need to know the answer but it is vitally important that we continue to wonder! If we stop getting curious we descend into cynicism or arrogance. When we stay open and curious we remain humble, which breeds compassion, love, inspiration, cooperation… all the lovely qualities of human beings that make us thrive.

When I ponder this I often feel a surge of inspiration and tears stream down my face. The possibility is that someone or something created me. Are they still watching or are they inside me? Is this life more than just a random occurrence? Could it be a beautiful thing with more meaning than I currently know? If so, what is death and what will happen to me? Wonderful questions! Wonderful feelings. 

So keep your wonder alive today. As you meditate, ponder the impossibility of life emerging naturally and what that means to you. What is this creative life force within you? Connect to it and enjoy your fabulous and mysterious life, today, right NOW.
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    Authors

    Neil Morbey is a coach, counsellor and  group facilitator for Positively-Mindful.com ; focusing on being a mindful adult in a modern world of triggers, traumas and overwhelm. 

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    Blog Index
    1. Relationships: The Ideal, The Ordeal, and The Real Deal
    2. Following The Gold Dust Of Our Trauma
    3. ​WORKING with ACT (Acceptace and Commitment Therapy)
    4. Client Case Study - The SPACE of SAFER communication: Capacity 04/02/2026
    5. The Neurochemistry of Anxious-Avoidant Attachment: Understanding and Healing the Cycle 02/02/2026
    6. Getting Excited About Becoming an Adult 0/01/2026  
    7. Family Constellations - My Experiences And Ponderings 10/12/2025  
    8. Are You Addicted To Drama? How Can You Recover Positivity?  02/12/2025  
    9. Exhausted? Maybe this is why... 01/12/2025   
    10. Combining Psychotherapy Counselling, Coaching, Meditation, Hypnotherapy and Positive Psychology - A Roadmap For Healing And Growth 29/10/2025     
    11. Changing the old stories and old neural pathways with THE WORK  07/07/2025   
    12. Embracing Complexity In Today's World 05/05/2025 
    13. Finding Micro-Moments of Peace in a Hectic World 01/05/2025  
    14. Why and how to regulate your nervous system 22/04/2025 
    15. A Healthy Dose Of Lazy Is Enlightened 01/04/2025  
    16. Giving and Receiving Feedback Graciously with "I want A RANT" tool  28/03/2025  
    17. 5 Mindfulness Techniques to Improve Your Mental Wellbeing  28/03/2025  
    18. Kirtan Kriya Meditation - Can it help memory and calm focus? 27/03/2025 
    19. Remembering The Power Of Presence: My Satvatove Experience with David Wolfe 30/01/2025
    20. Why I’m done with the 'cult of self improvement' and Goenka's rigid Vipassana
    21. EMDR and AIP models for trauma therapy
    22. ​Mistakes are opportunities to learn, grow and connect
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    24. ​It's Time To Stop Being Ashamed Of Our Mental Health
    25. Mind - Body Health Benefits: How mindfulness connects it al
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    27. Practical Steps for Finding Peace After Loss
    28. FOMO to JOMO: The Joy of Now 10/09/2024
    29. Mentoring-teaching-what-to-think-as-well-as-how-to-think 15/8/24
    30. Putting Intersectionality into daily practice  27/05/24
    31. Self-Care is not a job, it's awesome, fun and wonderful!  10/04/202
    32. How Active Rest Refreshes Us 05/04/2024
    33. Voicing Vulnerability awaken-the-adult-state  05/03/2024
    34. How To Do A Daily Check-In And Intention Setting 27/11/23
    35. Fuel inspiration by pondering the beginning of all life 23/7/23
    36. The Gentle Village - A place to talk about relationships ​3/3/23
    37. Imagine if... you loved healthy habits ​24/12/22
    38. Philosophy is BS 7/11/22
    39. 3 Powerful Journalling Tools To Process Troubling Thoughts 27/9/22
    40. SAFER communication to help in emotional conversations 2/9/22
    41. Re-Schooling Ourselves: Refreshing Our Narratives 25/8/22
    42. Grounding: Stabilize your Wobbles 22/7/22
    43. How to appreciate your struggle 10/3/2022
    44. Allowing Ourselves To Rest 2/2/2022
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    47. Practices To Improve Polyvagal Tone 12/11/2021
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    49. Reschooling and Reparenting - Heal and Train Yourself (Like a Kitten) 26/10/2021
    50. Compare and Despair? Remember Now is Wow! 12/10/2021
    51. Using Self Awareness to Overcome Negative Emotions and Heal Your Trauma Patterns 5/10/2021
    52. How to find true love using meditation 28/9/2021
    53. 7 Steps To Establish a New Habit 20/9/2021
    54. Understanding the Main Styles of Counseling 21/5/2021
    55. When to listen to your gut: The power of intuition and instinct 1/3/2021
    56. Breaking the Lockdown Blues 4/2/2021
    57. Trying to Change a Habit? Forget Dopamine Fasting, Take a Holiday! 20/11/2020
    58. How To Liberate Yourself From Wounded Patterns 3/11/2020
    59. Overstimulation - The reason you struggle to focus 16/9/2020
    60. Reminding myself everyday: The MORNING routine 12/9/2020
    61. How to STOP reacting to anxiety 11/5/2020
    62. Creating a Meditation Space for Your Home - Top Ten Tips 5/3/2020
    63. Top 5 things the children loved about Mindfulness classes 9/12/2019
    64. What I learned from my week of being perfectly imperfect, ME 27/11/2019
    65. 5 things I learned from a retreat for fools 5/11/2019
    66. How To Meditate - An Example Practice (Body Scan) 25/9/2019
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    69. How Nature Can Enrich Your Mindfulness Practice 19/6/2019
    70. Radical Coaching: Shadowing 25/4/2019
    71. Timed Talk & Listen - a tool to practice in relationship. 22/3/2019
    72. 5 Things SOME People Regret On Their Deathbed 6/3/2019
    73. Mindfulness at work: more ways to create balance, focus and clarity. 25/1/2019
    74. Everything you need to know about meditation posture and structure. 19/12/2018
    75. Mindfulness Coaching - is it for you? 23/10/2018
    76. Happiness: How Do We Find The Balance? 19/9/2018
    77. The Work of Ghostbusting: Meet the mind with kind inquiry 25/1/2018
    78. Youth Mindfulness: Why is teaching mindfulness in schools so helpful? 12/11/2017
    79. Youth Mindfulness: Why is teaching mindfulness in schools so helpful? 12/11/2017
    80. Removing Drama Is As Easy As A-B-C! (Part 2 - Spot the signals, name the role.)  24/10/2017
    81. Using Mindfulness to Sleep Better 7/9/2017
    82. 3 Ways you can help your workplace become more mindful. 16/8/2017
    83. Top 5 things the children loved about Mindfulness classes 9/12/2019
    84. What I learned from my week of being perfectly imperfect, ME 27/11/2019
    85. 5 things I learned from a retreat for fools 5/11/2019
    86. How To Meditate - An Example Practice (Body Scan) 25/9/2019
    87. How mindfulness can help you to enjoy the journey. 31/7/2019
    88. Has Mindfulness sold out and become McMindfulness? 24/6/2019
    89. How Nature Can Enrich Your Mindfulness Practice 19/6/2019
    90. Radical Coaching: Shadowing 25/4/2019
    91. Timed Talk & Listen - a tool to practice in relationship. 22/3/2019
    92. 5 Things SOME People Regret On Their Deathbed 6/3/2019
    93. Mindfulness at work: more ways to create balance, focus and clarity. 25/1/2019
    94. Everything you need to know about meditation posture and structure. 19/12/2018
    95. Mindfulness Coaching - is it for you? 23/10/2018
    96. Happiness: How Do We Find The Balance? 19/9/2018
    97. The Work of Ghostbusting: Meet the mind with kind inquiry 25/1/2018
    98. Youth Mindfulness: Why is teaching mindfulness in schools so helpful? 12/11/2017
    99. Youth Mindfulness: Why is teaching mindfulness in schools so helpful? 12/11/2017
    100. Removing Drama Is As Easy As A-B-C! (Part 2 - Spot the signals, name the role.)  24/10/2017
    101. Using Mindfulness to Sleep Better 7/9/2017
    102. 3 Ways you can help your workplace become more mindful. 16/8/2017
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    104. Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish 23/6/2017
    105. 3 Steps to returning to your nature 10/6/2017
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    107. Low Energy? Listen to your needs. 12/5/2017
    108. How to stay inspired (not impotent by importance). 29/4/2017
    109. What is Spirituality? (And how does it relate to thinking?) 14/4/2017
    110. Breath Works: practices to program BOLD focus. 23/3/2017
    111. Procrastination part 3: TURNING THE SHIP AROUND 10/2/2017
    112. Loosen your TIES to suffering 20/1/2017
    113. Understanding Procrastination Part 2: Just do it now. 15/12/2016
    114. What happens in a 1 hour mindfulness class? 23/11/2016
    115. Transforming Hatred with Kindness - Storytime! 1/11/2016
    116. When Feedback hurts - Own your Shit - Take a SEAT 4/10/2016
    117. No pain, no gain? 22/7/2016
    118. Life is like an echo... echooo... echooooo.... 8/6/2016
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    120. An Awesome or Choresome Life? 24/4/2016
    121. Mindfulness for Young People? 8/4/2016
    122. Explore the depths of your ocean. 29/3/2016
    123. Let Go and Be - escape the Drama triangle! 22/3/2016
    124. THE IMPORTANCE OF FEEDBACK 2/3/2016
    125. Don't Mindfill 22/2/2016
    126. Love is messy, scary, risky... Love and need? 9/2/2016
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    128. Dealing with the emotional drop 12/1/2016
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    130. Useful language and tools for creating healthy discussion 12/12/2015
    131. Craving the crux: 10 lessons learned from my rock climbing addiction 9/12/2015
    132. PLAYFULNESS AND PRESENCE: TEDX BELFAST 2015  30/11/2015
    133. Orestes, The Furies and The Eumenides (Kindly ones). A story of vengeance, guilt and forgiveness 5/11/2015
    134. Learning barefoot: feeling more 26/10/2015
    135. Musings on Choice and Obligation 20/10/2015
    136. What is enlightenment and what's the process of getting there? 10/9/2015
    137. What is Mindfulness and Why Practice? 3/9/2015
    138. ​​My Vipassana Retreat Experience 9/7/2015

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